It was a sunny Colorado day; just the pleasant sort of day for errands. I was getting groceries out of my car when I heard a little commotion behind me.
There was a moth banging over and over into the garage window – and on the other side there was a bird simultaneously banging over and over into the glass. Now, the moth’s intent was simple. “I just want out of here!” The bird’s intent was simple, too. “I just want moth for lunch.” I watched for a couple minutes and neither of them gave up until I scared the bird away by walking out of the garage.
So, as usual, I began to relate these two little critters to my single life.
- ** I’m in a place I don’t like and I want to get into a better place.
- ** I’m feeling very hemmed in and want to be freeeeeeeeee!
- ** What in the world is this wall I can see through which keeps me from being freeeeeeeeee?
- ** I want the grass and sunshine I see and not this gloomy garage!
- ** I’m just flying along being birdy and realize it’s time for lunch.
- ** Should I go to arches of gold or hut of pizza?
- ** In the meantime, here’s a tasty looking moth. Here I go!
- ** Bammety bam bam! What in the world. . . . .? (Repeat 10 times.)
I’ve often acted just like those little creatures. How many times have I complained to God that I’m tired of where I am and tired of being alone? Too numerous to count, I’m afraid. For instance:
- ** It just seems that if I were married, I’d have a built-in companion to do stuff with. Crash!
- ** We’re attracted to each other. We can work on the spiritual stuff later. Bang!
- ** Surely God wouldn’t deny me the desire of my heart. After all, He promised. (Psalm 37:4) Wham!
I’ve discovered that my perception is often flawed. Sometimes something looks good on the surface, not so good under. When I was about 5, my mother was making bread. I saw the rising dough and decided to snitch a piece because surely it would taste as good as cookie dough. So, I took a small blob and ran outside to enjoy. As Charlie Brown of Peanuts fame might say: Aaaarrrggghhh! In other words: raw bread dough does not taste good! It isn’t in its finished state – baked.
It’s all in the timing!
OK. You get the picture. The one who penned Psalm 73 hit it right on the head for potential birds and moths like me.
- ** I know God is good – – – – – but I’m stumbling around here by myself.
- ** Everyone around me seems to have things so much better – like money and companionship.
- ** They are healthy and happy and trouble-free.
- ** Now, I do see that they act in ways I choose not to – even violently with evil intent.
- ** Oh yes, they have potty mouths, too.
- ** But, they still have friends and are having a good time.
- ** I thought following God would be happier and more comfortable.
- ** Instead, I’m lonely and tired and don’t feel good.
- ** Is following God worth it?
I find some comfort in the fact I’m not alone in the hard places! I’ve learned a lot of tough lessons in the process of going from young to seasoned singleness. Following Jesus is full of challenges – but the commitment is worth it! If I could go back to talk to my younger self, I would say, “God’s word provides the guidance I need even – or especially – when I don’t get it – or even want it. Meanwhile, keep talking to God about what your heart is feeling! He can take it.”
Fortunately, the Psalmist brings us to a glorious conclusion in verse 28:
“But I’m in the very presence of God – oh, how refreshing it is! I’ve made Lord God my home. God, I’m telling the world what you do! (The Message)